I've decided to change gears and take some time away from DWARFED for a little while and focus on a new project I'm working on. It's a Gothic, historical romance set in Northumbridge during the 1200's. I don't think there will be any pigs :( but I know there's going to be lots of cattle, maybe even a few cute calves.
I'm not completely sure what directions this story will take, I'm working on the 1st draft right now and just have a basic outline for the first few chapters. So far, I'm excited about the project, mostly because it's so different from everything else I've written.
Thick
black clouds, gathered, layering one on
top of another until light from the moon and the stars couldn’t break free and
the night sky became cavernous nothingness about to swallow the world. Occasionally
one split open, spitting icy drops of water that felt like tiny daggers
striking the skin.
The wind was a living thing,
screaming, it tore through the dense, forest, cackling it forced the trees to
bend and swirl in a macabre dance that tangled the limbs and threatened to snap
trunks. It screeched as it found Rachel, laughing with delight as it tangled
her long blonde hair and twined her cloak about her ankles.
Rachel ignored the wind, her only
concern was putting as much distance between herself and the castle as she
possibly could.
Sharp sticks jabbed into the bottom
of her bare feet as she changed from the wide driveway and onto the narrows
path that cut into the thick forest. The driveway provided the most direct
route to the main gate, but it also was the first place they would look for her
when they realized she had escaped. The forest was safer.
I love the imagery and the tension---and I want to know why Rachel wants to get away so badly!
ReplyDeleteDid they say "driveway" in the 1200s? I don't know what they would have called it instead . . . a lane?
Echo Sarah W's comments, plus, I liked the line about the forest being safe.
ReplyDeleteUsually just the opposite.
So much darkness and danger in a forest at night, the alternative must really
be bad.
Well done!
I'm the third on "driveway" possibly not being in use in the 1200s.
ReplyDeleteOther than that--intriguing, Jess. A big change, but you write so beautifully! Nice visuals. :-)
Nice set up here for sure! Very nice imagery and sense of foreboding.
ReplyDeleteLovely description of the weather and atmosphere. Puts you right there. But I too think "driveway" too modern. In 1200 I don't think the castle would have had one.
ReplyDeleteSuper excited to see you writing historical fiction, Jess. I hope we'll get to read more of this. You're an extremely versatile writer.
ReplyDeleteTerrific details and voice. This piece definitely has a life and voice of its own -- nice work!
ReplyDeleteNo, no, no! What is a Sunday without your little piggies? :( Awww.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I do love this new snippet. Your writing sounds comfortable and strong, and it's lovely to read. Nicely done.
Beautiful imagery. Wherever this story is going it's starting out strong. Nice snippet.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you'll have some horses in this one :)
ReplyDeleteI love that last line--what is so horrible in that castle that a forest at night is considered safer! Definitely want to know what's going on. You do set a firm tone of spookiness!
I immediately felt chilled - very powerful descriptions! your poor heroine, going barefoot - she must be desperate. It just all flowed together into one excellent excerpt!
ReplyDeleteGreat descriptions! I could feel the desperation. I want more!
ReplyDeleteThank you ;D
DeleteYour voice is absolutely breathtakingly beautiful in this, Jess! I think you've found your niche. :) And I'm so curious why she is running away...
ReplyDeleteThank's Zee. It took a couple of false starts, but I think I've found my rhythm.
DeleteLove the wind. I can see this...wonderful!
ReplyDeleteI don't blame you for being excited about this new project. You definitely drew me in with your beautiful and vivid description and Rachel's flight. Her laughter and apprehension are in stunning contrast to each other and bring her to life. A great start to a historical novel. I'm really looking forward to more of this, Jess!
ReplyDeleteThanks Ryan!
DeleteFabulous descriptions and those last couple lines really pulled me in.
ReplyDeleteI also loved how you use the wind.
ReplyDeleteGorgeous description. You swet me right with the heroine. Super eight!
ReplyDeleteNice weather descriptions, but the word "driveway" seemed a little out of place for the 13th century. Wouldn't it just have been a road? Had wheeled transport even replaced pack horses?
ReplyDeleteI agree on the use of driveway, it's on my list (extensive) of things I need to look up. I'm guessing lane or road is more correct for the period. Thanks :)
DeleteFabulous imagery!
ReplyDeleteVery vivid and beautiful descriptions! I'm excited to see where you'll take us on this journey! :)
ReplyDeleteLove the visceral nature of your descriptions here. Looking forward to more of this!
ReplyDeleteThis is a nicely detailed scene here. For a first draft, I think the story has potential. Interesting you set this in the 1200s; A time period I'd love to have lived in, don't ask me why.
ReplyDeleteI love this voice--it's so different from Dwarfed! But you have to include some animals. You write them so well.
ReplyDeleteFantastic imagery in this. I was right there with her. I could even hear the wind. Very well done.
ReplyDeleteLike many others, I'm hooked wanting to know why a forest on a wet night is safer than the castle. So I'd keep reading :)
ReplyDeleteGreat imagery, Jess, and a promising start. Good luck! :)
ReplyDeleteSounds like the beginnings of a great story. Already we have action and questions. Good post.
ReplyDeleteYou had me hooked with this line: "The wind was a living thing, screaming, it tore through the dense, forest, cackling it forced the trees to bend and swirl in a macabre dance that tangled the limbs and threatened to snap trunks." I wanted to run and hide. Well done!
ReplyDeleteThank you. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
DeleteThe opening has a real Gothic feel to it. I'm wondering why she wants to get away from the castle.
ReplyDeleteWow! Beautifully written. Thank you for sharing. Wonderful snippet!
ReplyDeleteMissing DWARFED but this one sounds great too. Your snippet definitely makes me want to know why she's running away.
ReplyDelete~Joyce Scarbrough
LOVE your voice here! I'm writing a historical and dictionary.com is my best friend. It shows the origin of each word, and if I hit on a word that's too modern all I have to do is click the thesaurus tab at the top for a whole bunch of options. I find another that sounds old, click it and go back to the dictionary tab to see if it'll hold up. Despite how arduous is sounds, it's a fast, painless process. I've become ridiculously addicted! ;c)
ReplyDeleteCan't wait to see more of this one!