Hi all!
If you stopped by a couple weeks ago when I last posted, I
can’t thank you enough for the helpful comments you made. Each one was great
and gave me a great deal to think about, which I’ve always felt was the whole
point of the WeWriWa blog hop. I’m always blown away by all the support and
great advice the writing community has to offer. Thanks so much!
I’m still posting from my contemporary romantic thriller
WIP, Shattered Glass. The protagonist is a
This week’s snippet is short, thanks to some 2 word
sentences and a bit heavy with pop culture references. It picks up right wherethe last snippet I posted left off.
“No
Winchesters. No problem.” Harlow shoved the phone into her back pocket. “I’m a
strong, independent woman. I’m smart. I’ve taken two self-defense classes. I
don’t need to be saved by any guy, no matter how handsome and accomplished they
are. I can take care of myself. Like Buffy.”
The words
sounded good, almost believable, yet they failed to calm her twitchy nerves.
Hey Jess, good to see another post from you! I like this one a lot, the first paragraph by itself is perfect for a woman trying to convince herself not to worry, and the ending sentence ties up the moment beautifully.
ReplyDeleteI do have one suggestion. She says she's taken two self-defenses *classes*, but to me there's a difference between classes and courses. Courses have several classes. It might have a bit more impact if she says *courses* instead.
Not everybody makes that distinction though, so if you're happy with what you wrote, that's cool :-)
Good suggestion! I hadn't even thought about the difference between classes and courses. Thanks!
DeleteI agree with what Marcia said on the classes and courses thing. Other than that, love how she's trying to convince herself that she can take care of herself. Great snippet.
ReplyDeleteI disagree with the 2 comments above - you take classes within the course. And after a couple of classes, you can start to feel like you could be Buffy. Tweeted.
ReplyDeleteAnd I took it to mean she'd had two classes (like you would sign up for at the YMCA)not at college. Depends on what you mean, so you might specify a bit more somehow. But it's a nice pep talk for someone alone trying to boost their confidence. Good snippet.
ReplyDeleteClasses...courses....I didn't take any issue with that. I thought it was good to show your character reminding herself that she's competent!
ReplyDeleteI like her little pep talk.
ReplyDeleteHaha- I suspect someone's a TV addict. At least she likes the fun stuff!
ReplyDeleteI got the Buffy reference. I've never seen the show, but did see the movie. I just reread your last wewriwa post, and gave the reference to pop culture some thought. I wonder if, perhaps, your target audience would be more likely to be familiar with your referenced characters than the audience for another genre?
ReplyDeleteIn addition, I've never seen the show you referenced in the last snippet, however, I realized that hero-type hunks must be involved, right? lol Anyway, I got the gist of the references.
I like your MC's self-confidence. A good, strong female MC--good for you. :-)
I love her way of trying to convince herself. I hope she succeeds! I'm of the right demographic to appreciate a good Buffy reference, too, so I like that a lot.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great snippet! I think she'll surprise herself. Nice work!
ReplyDeleteI love how she's building up her courage by invoking Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
ReplyDeleteFirst thing that popped into my mind: famous last words. LOL
ReplyDeleteAh, Buffy I've watched so I got that reference. :) Great snippet!
ReplyDelete(Though, only two self defence classes wouldn't have taught her much. Did you mean courses or is she just trying to pump herself up with whatever little thing she can think of?)
Like Diane, above, my first thought was 'famous last words!' Wyoming without a cell phone signal - sounds serious! Good snippet. Will look forward to reading more.
ReplyDeleteYeah, tough like Buffy. Love that reference and the way she's trying to bolster her confidence with words.
ReplyDeleteGood for her. She'll talk herself out of being scared yet! LOL! Good snippet!
ReplyDelete