Sunday, February 23, 2014

Pig Kibble 2/23/14 WeWriWa Snippet


http://www.wewriwa.com/

Welcome back for another week of great writing snippets! It's a marvelous experience.

My original plan was to post 8 sentences that follow my last WeWriWa post, which was selected from my YA WIP, Dwarfed, but I stumbled across
this particular snippet while editing the other day and it tickled my sense of humor, so I decided to post it instead. Some creative editing was required before it fit the 8 sentence limit.

Don't forget to visit the blogs of my fellow Sunday snippet and Weekend Writing Warriors participants as they post collections of sentences from their works in progresses and completed manuscripts. Every genre is represented.



If I get in the stall with the piglets, I won’t be trapped, but I also won’t be able to get out very quickly. Luke’s tall enough to jump over the side,  I’m not. I’ll be pig kibble.

I stare at the sow: her floppy ears jiggle and bounce as she leans into Luke’s touch. I swear she’s smiling.

“She's an old pro at this,” Luke says. “She knows humans aren't going to hurt her babies.”

“Will you keep scratching her?” Maybe, if his fingers keep her distracted, she won’t develop an impulsive hatred of redheaded teenagers. 

Funny, it looks like such a short little snippet, but I had to use some creative editing in order to meet the requirements and I still went one sentence over.

39 comments:

  1. Jess, that's so charming and lighthearted! Perfect YA. Love how you work in details like her height or the color of her hair.

    P.S. I just wanted to mention that I had to look up the word "kibble" for I was unfamiliar with it, and when I googled the phrase "pig kibble", a link to your wewriwa post popped up in third place. :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cool! Not only have I learned that pig kibble is a great way to boost my blogs SEO, I also now know that kibble isn't an international word. In the U.S. it's used mostly in reference to dog/cat food. Are there any similar slang words you'd use instead.

      Delete
    2. I'm guessing kibble is a pretty common word! The reason I didn't stumble across it before was that according to the dictionary I'm using, it's very specifically used for "dry pet-food", emphasis on the dry part, but also interchangeable with "grind" and oddly enough, in Britain, "bucket". I don't know if that's correct though!? I knew of the words feed, food and chows, that's what appears when I look up the German word "Futter". Fascinating stuff. :D

      Delete
  2. An unusual snippet that caught my interest :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Nice pig story. Your narrator seems so uncomfortable.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Excellent! That's what I was shooting for in this snippet. 500lb+ new mammas can be intimidating.

      Delete
  4. The writing in this scene is so transparent, I forgot I was reading and stepped into the pig pen with her. Very well done.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Pig kibbles! Hilarious. Love this eight. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Even when she's nervous, she has a snappy wit! I'm really liking this story.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Aw, they can be quite scary pigs, I can just see her standing there hoping for the best!

    ReplyDelete
  8. That last line put me to mind of the "red-headed stepchild" :-) I'm glad she has a healthy respect for pigs. When I was young, I remember seeing chicken feathers in the pig pen. Some silly ( and soon to be deceased) chicken must have seen something in there worth pursuing.

    I like Grace. I like her spunk, I like her way of dealing with the extra challenges that face her. Great character, Jess. And you know I love this story. :-) It's unique.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Back in my 4-H and FFA days, I never considered my pigs dangerous, but my perspective has changed. They're the ultimate ommnivore. The old HBO show, Deadwood, did a pretty good job showing that, and I've heard a few harrowing real world stories of farmers who people think had heartattacks or strokes while feeding the hogs.

      They're a wonderful animal, but they need to be respected. One a sort of related note, most horses are afraid of pigs.

      Delete
  9. Nice witty humor in this snippet. And no, it's not too short...we only get 8 sentences after all. You sure love animals and incorporate them flawlessly in your stories. Great 8!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Unusual and interesting snippet. Not sure how much iId trust that sow...

    ReplyDelete
  11. Horses are afraid of anything if it suits them -- rocks, telephone poles, dry ditches...

    Fun snippet. I know I would think multiple times before getting into a pen with a mama pig and a bunch of new babies.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My youngest horse is terrified of ceilings. Since I had pigs growing up, my horses were never phased by them, but everyone else I know seems to have at least one good story about how their horse is afraid of pigs.

      Thanks for stopping by!

      Delete
  12. Interesting. I enjoy this story, the characters feel so real to me. Personally, no way I'd step into that pen! Luke or no Luke...another great snippet!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Mammas with new babies are potentially dangerous, no matter what the species. God snippet.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Pigs are scary. I'm with every one else...don't become kibble!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Love the "pig kibble" term. :) No may in hell I'd step in there even if I knew I could get out. My only pig story is the 410lb pig we recently split with someone that is now in my freezer. :) You do a very good job of incorporating the animals into your stories, it reflects your experience with them. Nice 8, Jess.

    ReplyDelete
  16. --LOL--!! Totally awesome excerpt, Jess. Absolutely wonderful. Visual, emotional, not too much detail, not too little, and we feel even closer to Grace than we did before, and I didn't think that was possible! You've got a first-rate story here, and you're telling it perfectly.

    ReplyDelete
  17. .....and that's a drop-dead-adorable photo up top, too!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks. That little guy, along with some of his siblings, helped me feed one night. He than graciously posed for some pictures.

      Delete
  18. very cute snippet. I never realized pigs were scary.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I've seen a pig up close. They're enormous and will eat anything. I understand her fears. Still, you managed to make this very cute.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I can relate to her fears. I knew someone with a potbellied pig--which are a smaller breed, but still not *small*--and she was one scary pig. If she didn't like you, she'd open her mouth and show you her teeth in a clear threat.

    I wouldn't want to get anywhere near that sow.

    ReplyDelete
  21. I have such a soft spot for little piggies, but big piggies mean business. So enjoyed this snippet! Thanks for sharing! :)

    ReplyDelete
  22. In the spring I enjoy taking long walks and spending time outside. I got to take a walk today and really enjoyed it.

    Virginia
    lead AT hotsheet DOT com

    ReplyDelete
  23. "Pig Kibble"... love that! :-) Charming and they do look like they're smiling don't they? But I totally get the "I don't want to mess with a mama" part. Great snippet!

    ReplyDelete